Wednesday, January 29, 2014

A Valid Question

How will I choose...

What Are You Doing Here?

What?

I said, what are you doing here?

I don't understand the question.

It's very simple.  I'm not sure I can make it simpler.  What.  Are.  You.  Doing.  Here.

Here?  Like, here on this blog?

Exactly.  What are you doing?

I'm... 

You're?

I'm?

You're...

I'm... None of your beeswax, you disembodied voice.  I started a blog.  I write stuff.  I post it.  Then, a dozen people turn up to read it (maybe two dozen, on a really good day).  Anyway - it's mine.  And what I do here is my concern, not yours.

Okay, look.  Maybe we got off on the wrong foot...

Yeah, the wrong-- wait.  You have feet?

Don't change the subject!

What subject?  You just showed up and started picking at me about... I don't know what... my *intentions* with my blog?  Is that it?

That's it.  What do you think it is that you are actually doing here?

Ah - you're thrown off by all the hobo stuff.  No worries.  I've got a page that EXPLAINS THE HOBOES...

No.  We understand the hoboes.  John Hodgman.  Back stories for his list of hobo names.  We get it.  And no, we don't even care to ask whether you plan on doing all 700 of them.  Make 'em a separate blog.  Don't make 'em a separate blog.  Do 'em all.  Stop now.  We don't give a rat's red rump.  That's neither here nor there.

Okay - that's kind of a relief, because if I'm being honest, I really don't know where I'm going with the whole hobo thing.  But, if that's not it, then just what are you asking, you who seem to have become plural?

What are you doing here?  How hard is that?

It's harder than it sounds, if you're asking existential questions of a blog and/or its blogger...

You need a minute?  We're totally okay with you taking a minute...


2,640 minutes later...

Okay.  Done.  I don't need any more minutes.

You have an answer?

Yes.

To "What are you doing here?"

Yes.

Alright, then.  Let's hear it.

You aren't going to like it.

We never said there's a wrong answer, did we?  Come on - out with it.

Okay, but don't say I didn't warn you about how very much you should be prepared to not like it...

It's fine.  GO.

I don't know, and I don't care.

What.

See?

No, no.  It's cool.  You don't know what you're doing here, and you don't care.

Correct.

You don't care what about what you're doing, or you don't care that you don't know?

Both?

We find you annoying.  Go back to your hoboes.  Wait - are you going to move the hoboes to their own blog, or what?  We noticed the new layout, here.  Kudos on your decision to stop making your readers' eyes bleed with that green-on-black text!

I find YOU annoying.  And I think that for now, the hoboes can stay here.  I may not know what I'm doing here, but I generally enjoy it, and the thought of doing whatever it is that I am doing on two separate blogs is just wholly unappealing.

Can we ask again in a month or two?

Oh, would you please?  That would be great.


An attempt at matching the not-the-same-old-writing-prompt from my buddies at STUDIO 30 PLUS with a not-the-same-old-post.  And yes, I really don't know what I'm doing, here (I might care a little bit, though).

12 comments:

  1. I like what you did here, even if you don't know what you're doing. Who knows what she/he is doing anyway?

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Katy! I'll figure it out, someday. In the meantime, it's all about the journey, not the destination. Or something.

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  2. Ha! I LOVED this... I also loved the fact that I didn't need to copy the text, paste it in an editor, reformat the whole thing (white background, big black letters) just so I could return here and with my eyes closed leave a comment. Please don't go back to black.

    By the way, none of us know what we're doing, it's what makes us so un-unique and totally attractive! ;)

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    Replies
    1. Thank you! I heard voices in my head when I read the prompt. Turns out, they were the pain cries of a Tooth Gone Bad, but still.

      Don't worry, no more black background, here. On my photo blog, however...

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  3. The back and forth was great, and the who's doing the talking was fantastic and easy to follow too, without using italics to differentiate between them. Hurrah!

    Also, never listen to the rantings of a Tooth Gone Bad. ;)

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    1. Yay! Thanks, SAM! The tooth still dominates my existence, at this point. I'm actually looking forward to a root canal.

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  4. I see you walking away in the middle of this, coming back, and calculating the 2,640 minutes. I would do that. Prolly take me that long to sort it all out as well . . . and the answer would be the same. In fact, I think it's the only valid answer to a valid question.

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    Replies
    1. I did! I did walk away in the middle, and yes - a calculator was involved, about one day later. I'm at peace with my answer. I think. Thanks for stopping by!

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  5. Oh goodness. This sounds like my head sometimes. It's even worse when I vocalize because my dog gets confused and barks at me. Love this!

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    1. If I had a dog, I'd get a lot of confused barking and that awesome puzzled-head-tilt. I was just happy to get through this without any of my Voices' regularly-scheduled bouts of profanity.

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  6. Once you figure it out, you're coming back to let us in on the secret... right? Right?!

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    Replies
    1. It's all about the seeking, Tara. I'll probably never figure it out, but just see if that stops me! Thanks for visiting!

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